Scanxiety Time …….

Crazy I know, but it seems to hit all of us. I finally got the letter I’ve been dreading all year asking me to come back in for my follow-up/check up to see if all is ok with my remaining kidney and that the cancer hasn’t come back or spread elsewhere.

So off I toddled to Bushey Hospital this morning to have a pre-chest x-ray and Liver Function blood test so I’m ready for my consultant next week who’ll do an Ultrasound and I guess a few other things. Logic has nothing to do with this, I feel as fit as a fiddle (tired but fit), I haven’t had any aches and pains other than the usual we all get from time to time, I was Grade I Stage I/II all encapsulated…. so why worry she said it was unlikely to come back, even Paul Nathan one of the top RCC oncologists in the country gave me a 90%+ chance of it never coming back. I’ve had one more bout of hermatospermia since she last saw me, but again she insisted that this was incidental and “just happens”… so why am I like a cat on hot bricks!!! crazy. In my head if I can just get the NED for the next 2 years I’ll feel much better about it.

Bushey isn’t a large hospital, in fact you could probably call it an hospitalette. It made me shudder having to walk past the operating theatre to get to the x-ray department…. they were lovely people and made my stay there last year as easy and comfortable as possible, but boy…. I couldn’t get out of there quick enough this morning.

I’ve been a bit off-line recently because of this, I hate talking about it and would rather retrench into my head until it’s all over, and I guess I’ll have to get used to that over the coming years …. I suppose we all cope in different ways.

If I’m honest having private health care is of some comfort, they don’t leave you waiting for hours on end to have Bloods and x-rays, you can just wander in when you feel like it. I was disgusted to hear that poor Lizzie was being treated so badly by her local hospital, it’s hard enough being ill in the first place without being made to feel like you have to tread on eggshells for fear of upsetting the medical staff….. you should be able to vent, ask questions, push for answers.

I’m pretty much ready for the David Blackett cycle ride to Westminster on 1st June, I’ve cycled into work 5 times in the last 2 weeks so that should be enough if I can keep it up (44 Miles round trip each time). Let’s hope the weather stays good for us!!

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